I couldn't sleep the other night, and started browsing through television stations hoping to find something amusing enough to garner my interest until I drifted off to never never land, and sure enough the Versus channel came through with a dandy. They were broadcasting a movie about one of the greatest basketball duo's to ever graze the court. Sidney Deane and Billy Hoyle, the salt and pepper street hustling duo that made themselves famous on the blacktops of Los Angeles. For those of you who are a little behind and not quite catching my drift, Sidney Deane and Billy Hoyle are the stars of one of the greatest American sports films of all-time, White Men Can't Jump. At some point during the movie there is a scene, where Sidney who is played by Wesley Snipes, issues a challenge to two potential suitors, proudly boasting that he could beat these two guys with the help of any other guy watching, telling his challengers to select his teammate. Now, this appeals to the interest of the opposition and they begin grazing the court for Sidney's partner, and to no one's surprise they select Billy, who is sitting down nearside, sporting a Wayne Gretzky jersey and backwards cap. Instantly, Billy proves that he truly is one of the best gunners of Louisiana college basketball since Pistol Pete, and him and Sidney easily handle their two competitors. The movie has plenty of other interesting scenes, but it was this particular one that got me thinking.
If a similiar situation were to unravel today in the world of professional sports, who would be the most unlikely superstar? After a brief mental debate, I once again landed in the sunny state of California. Although this time, we travel to San Francisco, and find a man named Tim. Tim Lincecum that is, the star right handed pitcher of the San Francisco Giants, whose long hair and physical stature couldn't strike fear into the heart of a young kitten, but his imposing fastball and swooping curve have struck fear into lineups across the National League. In all seriousness, Tim Lincecum looks more like a kid who would suffer health problems from a 27 hour binger on World of Warcraft than that of a man hard pressed to be a back-to-back Cy Young Winner. For some reason I could just picture a few guys on a baseball diamond somewhere, talking lots of smack, and one guy saying anybody on the field could strike you out, and that guy surveying his options and selecting Lincecum. At which point, this dude would be bamboozled and probably fall over in the batter's box. But anyways, I just wanted to throw out my props to the long haired righty, who does a better job resembling that dude from Dazed and Confused, than an intimdating prescence such as Bob Gibson on the mound, that is of course until you step into that batter's box.
I was enjoying the finer parts of an Orioles baseball game the other evening, and that finer part is the outside area surrounding Pickles and Sliders, when somehow a conversation arose that gathered my interest. It was regarding this woman's quest to find love via the internet. As you may know, I have ventured into my thought's on online dating twice now, once in regards to a former roommate of Julia, and once in regards to a girl who was hit on by Batman. Nevertheless, this girl began to talk about her feelings on the whole issue and offered a stunning revelation. Supposedly, all the 20 some year old guys that get involved with online dating fall into two catergories. They are either socially awkward or they just want to get laid. For some reason, after six months of paying a social networking site for their services, this girl finally came to this realization. I guess it took six months of paying fees to realize that someone who has to resort to paying a website to create an opportunity for himself to meet women, would be socially awkward. For hells sake, Mike Fick of all people has picked up women in traffic jams and 7-11, and these guys have to pay for the opportunity to describe their best details to a world of discourage women looking for their shot at love. It's a funny place we live in, and I'm sure Jay is out there somewhere surfing the dating websties as we speak. As for the guys out there just to get laid, well that's a whole another ballgame, and I'm not going to go there just now. But for a sidenote, following this conversation Jamal and Bobby signed up and are now representing Team Skeezer via the world wide web. Also, if you feel like a good laugh and listening to good music at the same time, check out Brad Paisley's music video "Online" on YouTube. You won't be dissappointed.
Baby Creech made an appearance in the greater Baltimore metropolitan area, and now that he is a free man he has decided to rock a guido hair cut that can put the fellas from "Growing Up Gotti" and even Matt Payne to shame. Loose women everywhere should be on the lookout, just ask Brann about that one.
"Even the Sun Shines on A Dog's Ass Someday."
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