Shakespeare, A Shotgun, and A Yellow Bug

March Madness is bound to do certain things. It's bound to bring out the idiots, its bound to provide close thrilling games, and it's bound to bring together a bunch of degenrates with nothing better to do than drink and watch basketball all day. The latter recently happened as Andy, Damon, Ross, and I got together for the first time in way too long. St. Patrick's Day and Andy's birthday may also have had something to do with that, but regardless it didn't take up much time to catch up. I met up with the trio at Buffalo Wild Wing's last Thursday and the place was certainly anything but wild. Although, there were a group of Villanova fans who were high class douchebags. Throughout the course of the day, Ross mumbled numerous curse words in their direction but they never noticed. They just kept on sipping their ice-teas and cheering for Scottie Reynolds. Eventually, I had to catch the fellas up on the ever sexy automobile I am currently driving and I gotta hand it to Stills he called it from inside the wing joint. As for Ross and Damon they seemed more intrigued by the shotgun sitting in the back and the Shakesepeare book sitting on my passenger seat. That and my Rhode Island tags. Damon originally wanted to get a picture of Ross and I in the car together, so he could come up with some creative reference to our sexuality, but thankfully that never happened and we just proceeded into Towson. Our first pit stop was at the old Get Bent Lounge and that place really sucks. The bartenders seemed like decent guys but George still owns the place and there isn't much they can do. Plus, the walls are covered in crappy Irish antiques and pictures, designed to give the guest an authentic Irish feel, when in reality it just looks like a hole-in-the-wall bar with a weird obsession for the Irish. Eventually, we came to our senses and got the hell out of there.

Later that night, we went to Batemans for an inspiring game of trivia with some very nice old people and the Jacoby's. Prior to the start of the game though, the Jacoby's felt guilty because of the size of our team and started their own team. It was rather unfortunate because I don't really think Keith, the guy running the show, really cared and it's always good to have the Jacoby's on your side. Shortly after the start of the game, Mary showed up and as usual the two of us got into a heated debate, resulting in Mary calling me a sexist. Which to be honest, is probably partially true, but I still feel that I made my point. Mary was complaining that Andrew didn't invite her to participate in any bracket challenges this year and as any friend should I supported the man. I told Mary that he probably just didn't want her to waste her money because her chances of winning would be slim. She took my remarks to be highly critical and became offensive and the last thing I would ever want to do is insult Mary, so I came up with the idea that Andrew probably wouldn't fare too well in a doll bracket. At this point the term sexist was brought out and I continued to argue my point, I knew back in the day Mary used to read books about a certain doll and that's what I was referring too, but at the time I could not recall the name of the doll, which led me to Luke and Luke came through big. Immediately, Luke knew that I was referring to the American Doll collection and I think Mary may have been somewhat surprised that I remembered she was quite into the whole American Doll thing or she realized argueing with me is pointless. Either way we proceeded to be civil towards each other and she eventually gave me a potato skin and that was nice of her.


Over the course of the weekend I began discussing the possibility of a road trip this summer and it seems that it may actually pull through. I think I'm going to head to the Windy City and partake in America's pastime. Originally, I discussed the idea with Ross but on Andy's birthday, the Jacoby's said they were down. On Sunday, when I mentioned to Ross that the Jacoby's would be joining the two of us and possibly Andy, Ross had an interesting remark. He mentioned that it would be an interesting mix and when I implied further as to what me meant he simply said something along the lines of "Two drunk assholes and two perfectly good kids." After that comment, I could do nothing but nod in agreement and go about my business.

Anyways, I gotta jet. Basketball has begun and Kansas State is playing and they have Roberto Clemente's son and that kid can ball.

Dwayne Wade- A Sub-Par College Player

I'm blogging today from the library at the university around my way and I must say its eerily quiet, even for a library. I'm guessing that has something to do with the whole spring break thing though. I came over here to attempt to gather research on possible conclusions to The Turn of the Screw by Henry James, but that seems to be a bit difficult and not very interesting, so I decided to blog.

My most recent means of employment has involved catering to the needs of elderly wealthy people with too much time and money on their hands and I must say its a pretty miserable job. There is little money to be made and the majority of the people that come into the place piss me off. For starters, anyone that would spend nearly 16,000 dollars a year to belong to a country club without a golf course is an absolute moron. I keep hearing it's about connections and it's a way of life, but I think its all a load of crap. Making matters worse, the majority of the members have a pompous attitude about them and act as if they are superior human beings. Just because your old, still alive and have money doesn't impress me and there have been times I'd rather talk with Jay. It gets real interesting when they host their social events and a whole lot of these people come together and mingle. Everyone is trying to put on a good front and impress one another and basically there isn't a real person in the whole club. The women all talk about how great their children are and how they are excelling in life, but if you ever see anyone under the age of eighteen enter the place, they appear to be more miserable than Duke fans following the Blue Devils early exit from the NCAA tournament. As for the men, well they always attempt to talk about sports, but yet they either know nothing or just refuse to call our the idiots. Last week, I was tending the bar and overheard a conversation between four elderly gentleman. The conversation started with the Terrapins and eventually moved on to the difference between the NBA and the NFL draft. Supposedly, there are no real surprises in the NFL and the NBA is full of superstars who never excelled at the lower level. This guy was going on and on about how every player that succeeds in the NFL is extremely well known and well heard of prior to their NFL success and the majority of stars in the NBA were complete no names prior to their success. In the course of his idiotic rant, he mentioned that no one had ever heard of Dwayne Wade or Kevin Durant in college, but now their two of the top players in the game. The funny thing is not one person he was talking with had the balls to call this man out and simply inform him that Wade nearly took Marquette to the National Championship game and Durant was only one of the best players in the whole country at Texas. But in this guy's mind, Wade and Durant were simply sub-par collegiate athletes, who excel at the NBA game. I guess its my fault for listening to him though, I really should have just walked away when he mentioned that Tim Tebow will be the next great thing in the NFL.

The big tourney is getting started this week and I'm hoping to get out for some of the games. As for the winner, I'm somewhat partial to the Jayhawks.

Well, I've spent enough time rambling on about silly old people and college basketball, I guess it's time to get back to ol' Harry.

100th Edition- Part Dos

Finally, after several weeks of delaying, I have found some time to post part two of my 100th blog, which is actually blog #102. Anyways, I will continue what I originally started and describe a few of the more memorable moments from the infamous Get Bent Lounge.


Monday Nights at the Kent

At your average bar, Monday night is typically a bit of a downer. The majority of people are recovering from their weekend antics and are trying to insert themselves back into the work week. This was not the story at the Kent. Rather than describe a few of the more memorable Monday nights, I have decided to instead focus on Monday nights in general. I will do this by listing a simple breakdown of how a Monday night at the Kent usually unfolded.

When I was frequenting the Kent on a regular basis on Monday nights, I was typically doing one of two things: working or playing trivia with Andy and Damon. If I was playing trivia, we would typically stroll into the bar around ten-thirty. If I was working, I would typically receive a text message from Damon simply stating "Kent". In the case that I was working, I would usually arrive just a bit behind schedule, usually no later than eleven. At this point there would always be a few random people sitting at one of the corners of the bar. Sometimes they would be hippies, other times they would be nineteen year olds, occassionly you would see a couple on a date, and from time to time there would be homeless men. Either way, the bar was pretty much always empty upon my arrival. Shortly after my arrival, a member of the Dream Team would stroll in and begin to drink and eventually their whole starting lineup would arrive. Once the Dream Team's starting lineup was in tact, they would bolt for another bar, because their options were limited at the Kent, and like wolves, the Dream Team travels in packs and at some point Mikey would stumble in and begin slamming Jack and Cokes.

Now, the night typically went one of two way, either it remained calm until close or absolute chaos prevailed. The latter typically occured on Monday night's when Pat and Jason, or Pat and Graham, or Pat and Gabe, or even Pat and Stan had been hitting the bottle, prior to our entrance. These nights were by far the more interesting of the two. In fact, there are two posts on random Monday nights at the Kent, if you feel like strolling through the history of my blog. Anyways, on these nights anything was bound to happen. Intense games of Uno were quite common, those Draw Four cards can be just devastating. Karokee nights without the assitance of a Karokee machine were also quite freqent, prompting several instances where Andy felt it necessary to dance on the bar. Football games in the parking lot were a common thought, random clapping and USA chants, and constant cursing of the Steelers were all bound to occur. All these events I have just described typically went on from the hours of midnight to one-thirty at one-thirty things tended to get a bit dicey.

By 1:30, every other bar in the vicinity of the Kent is calling last call and that meant it was time for the stragglers to appear. First, the Dream Team would return short-handed. One or two members of the team had usually been sniped by some poor schmuck at some other bar. The ones who made it back often came back with a large group of vultures desperately attempting to woo one back to his apartment, but if you leave the bar with a member of the dream team and youre destination isn't straight to your apartment or the back seat of your car, your chances are slim. In fact, once back in the Kent, these girls were rejuvenated and it's at these moments that people like Damon and myself have been tempted by their vices. A few minutes till two, guys like John would typically stroll into the Kent. Guys that piss people like Pat and Jason off because they don't show up till 2, demand attention and shots, piss off the regular patrons of the bar, and probably don't even leave a tip. At this point the only thing left to do, was to throw a twenty down on the bar, thank Pat, and get as far away as possible, because the only thing left is a den of inequity.


I was debating talking about numerous Thanksgiving Eve's as the fifth and final part of my 100th post, but I decided to leave it at Monday nights. I can always put up a post about Thanksgiving Eve, but everyone really knows what goes on that night, so I will leave it alone. Anyways, spring break is next week, so I'm hoping I get the chance to put up a couple more posts.